Help for Seniors

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Help for Seniors

Post by 22lrfan on Fri Jan 24, 2014 10:09 pm

Seniors:
Here are some hints on how to liven up your idle hours and help you maintain a healthy level of insanity:

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.  Watch 'em slow down.

2. On all your check stubs, write 'For Marijuana'

3. Skip down the street, rather than walk and see how many strange looks you get.

4. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

5. Sing along at the opera.

6. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, 'I Won! I Won!'

7. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, 'Run for your lives! They're loose!'

8. Tell your children over dinner, 'Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.'

And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity :

9. Pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the counter, and ask where the fitting room is.

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Re: Help for Seniors

Post by phreddyphlinstone on Sat Jan 25, 2014 2:35 am

It should in no way be indicative of my current state of mental health that I already did at least 5 of these things.........

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Re: Help for Seniors

Post by Hammer on Sat Jan 25, 2014 2:51 am

darinhamby wrote:It should in no way be indicative of my current state of mental health that I already did at least 5 of these things.........

 lol  Which 5?

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Re: Help for Seniors

Post by phreddyphlinstone on Sat Jan 25, 2014 2:53 am

On the advice of my attorney, I respectfully decline to answer based on my 5th amendment right not to incriminate myself.........

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Re: Help for Seniors

Post by Hammer on Sat Jan 25, 2014 3:24 am

Funny 

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Re: Help for Seniors

Post by phreddyphlinstone on Sat Jan 25, 2014 4:05 am

1,3,4,6&7.
Hypothetically speaking, of course!

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